"Be the change you wish to see the world."

You can see where I'm going with the quote by Mahatma Ghandi.
Several people have noticed my mood on facebook over the weekend was set to "Katy has given up on trying to please everyone & is ok with it." I've been getting alot questions & I needed something to blog about, so I figured I might as well. What really kinda pushed me to write about it was the added fact that Savvy wrote on her blog about something that is related to what I've been thinking.

Anyone who knows me could probably tell you there are a few things I just cannot abide. Some of them are: those who do not care about others, who are self-absorbed, who find no purpose for sevice, who are "two-faced",who lie especially to those who care about them & when there is no reason to, who only see what they want to, who gossip,who judge when they know nothing about a situation, & who think themselves far better than others. I'll be nice about it, but I do not have any use for anyone who does these things. I try to avoid these people, usually because I feel that it robs me of the spirit because of the feelings I have about the situation. Granted, this is something I should rise above & be better about. But I feel that while I'm working on it, I must have the spirit with me.

Lately, I have found myself avoiding alot of situations. I know people who if I can't do what they want to do when they want to do it, I am no longer considered a friend. Other people, do not always understand that marriage & family change things alot, but they don't have to change everything. And yet others, who I constantly face in public & church, who form their own opinions about every aspect of your life whether they know anything about you or not. The last, is what I seem to have the biggest problem accepting & overcoming. Maybe because it includes most of the things I mentioned that I cannot abide. What makes it worse, is that alot of times it is not just people who don't know me, it's people who know me but don't know everything about me. But they pretned to & end up using it to their advantage. I don't know what they gain in painting me or those I love in a darker light, but they must feel they gain something from it. These people are no longer the children I encountered in middle & high school, but they are adults who know better. Many even have children. What kind of example does that set?

Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means! We are all guilty of at some point passsing judgement on others that we have no business doing. We are not privy to all information & have no need to be. Things that are private, are between those that it involves & the Lord. No one else. No one is required to make things general knowledge if they do not wish to. Nor is it anyone's business to make it public knowledge or speculate on any aspect of anyone's life other than their own.

I have not been the only person plauged by feelings of hurt, betrayal, distrust, disbelief in the human race, etc. I know many others in my circle of family & friends alone who have either removed themselves from the situation, or have seriously considered it. What I don't seem to be able to understand is how this has a place in our society, in our churches, & in our homes? While I try to tell myself that it happens to everyone, I can't help but see & wonder why there are those who seem to be given more than their fair share or what they deserve?

But, alas, all I can do is my best to not be the kind of person I so strongly dislike, & to prove those that say things wrong. To show them who I really am. If they don't want to see it, then it is their loss. I'm not perfect, but I'm certainly trying to work towards it. So I, like so many others out there that we don't even think of, go about my business, smile, keep my friends & family close, keep the spirit close, try to remember to love & understand others & their situations, & try my darnedest(yes, it's a word) to be the better person I know I can be. I think alot of people could learn that & we'd live in a far better world. But at least I can start with me.